RUFUS!
by Andreah
Summary: Rufus has been doing some very bad things...but why would Rufus chew up Cloud's shoes? FIND OUT! and please review!


Disclaimer: I do not own Final Fantasy VII. I do not own Squaresoft. I do not own anything that comes into play in this fic. Thank you.

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RUFUS!!!

Cloud looked angry. He was walking around in bright blue socks. Well, they weren't exactly bright blue anymore. They'd been stuck inside those boots of his for so long, they were now very…dingy. And the heels had been worn through, but that was because Cloud had been so busy fighting evil that he never took the time to take off his boots.

So naturally, his feet smelled to high heaven.

Anyway, Cloud was searching. He grabbed a doorframe and practically threw his head through to see if what he was looking for was in there.

Tifa looked up from counting out the tips she'd received that day. "Cloud?" He growled and continued his search. Tifa blinked and then threw her hands over her nose and lunged for the window.

The smell of smelly feet that smells most smelly had wafted its way into her room, crept through the air silently, and found its way to her nose, where her brain picked up the smell and sent nerves to the parts of her body that made her gag and practically pass out. She tripped over something on her way to the window. She looked down and saw one of her boots there, chewed to pieces. She grabbed it.

"Cloud!" she called. He looked back at her, and she saw that he was carrying his boots, but they were _both_ chewed up! _Why would **ANYONE** want to chew on CLOUD'S shoes?!_Then it all made sense.

She looked at Cloud.

Cloud looked at her.

"Rufus?"

"Yup."

"Looking for him?"

"Yup."

Together, they searched the hallway, intermittently calling "RUFUS!" when they heard someone shouting from outside.

"(*#*&$)*%($*&(#*$&)%(#(*&(&$#(*#$)%&(*#&)()(*%(#*&!!! WHY THE *$&)@(*)@$&%(*#&$)%(@*#)$&#$(%&)@($**$&%(#*%)(@#*)*($*@%*?!"

It was Cid Highwind. He stomped inside, carrying an empty plate. He glared at Cloud and Tifa.

"THE @(*&#%(*&$(*&% STOLE MY @(#*&$(&#$%)*@#&$)( LUNCH!!" He waved the plate around angrily. Then it hit a wall and broke. Cloud and Tifa looked down at the glass, then to their bare (or in Cloud's case _socked_) feet.

"Well, isn't this nice?" Cloud muttered angrily.

"RUFUS YOU LITTLE (*@#&$(*^%!" Cid shouted. "WHERE THE (@#*&$ ARE YOU?!"

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW!!!" It was a very girly shriek, and seeing as Aerith was dead, it had to be Yuffie. Yup. It was Yuffie. She was barefoot, and she came hopping out of her room on one foot. She stopped in front of them, cleverly avoiding the plate chips. "He peed in my ROOM!" she shouted to Tifa.

"Hey, it's not MY fault!" Tifa said defensively. "I didn't let him in!" She turned to Cloud.

"Don't blame _me_!" he said in a very snarly voice. "It wasn't my idea in the first place!"

"Why is there vomit in my coffin?" They all jumped at the quiet sound of Vincent Valentine's voice. He was standing nearby, in the shadows, his claw glinting in the light. "Of all the things that I've been through, I never expected to find vomit in my bed!"

"RUFUS!" the other four shouted and began running (and hopping) past the broken plate and downstairs. Silently, Vincent followed them.

Barret looked up at them. He actually looked the most calm of them all! WOW!

"Where is he?" Cid snarled. "Where's the little (#*&%(*@#?!"

"Why?" Barret asked. "What did he do now?"

"He ate my #*$(*#& lunch!"

"He chewed up my shoe!"

"He peed in my room!"

"He vomited in my coffin!"

"He chewed up BOTH my shoes!"

When they were reminded of this, everyone's hand flew to their nose.

"Daddy?" Marlene came into the room. "Why's everyone shouting?"

Barret picked up his adopted daughter (but she doesn't know it, though…) and perched her on his broad shoulder. "They're mad at Rufus, baby," he told her truthfully. She looked at them with the cute innocence that only someone as cute and friendly and innocent as Marlene can conjure.

"Why?" she asked them. Tifa and Cloud held up their boots. Yuffie pointed to her foot.

"He ate my…" he resisted the urge to curse because Barret would beat him down later if she picked up any more "colorful" language from him, even though BARRET himself cursed! "…lunch!"

"Rufus vomited in my bed," Vincent added. "Call him out."

Marlene sighed and hung her head. "Okay." She climbed down from Barret's shoulder and walked back into the room she was previously in. She came back in with…

…

…

…

…is the suspense killing you yet? ^_~

…

…a puppy.

…a puppy named Rufus.


End file.
